Well then, it would have to be a house on a mountain next to our personal town, with a zipline from the top to the far side of the lake so you can drop in near the end.

And a park next to the town with ostriches and kangaroos to watch them battle for the territory. I can picture a cool motocross track circling the mountain halfway up, carved into it like a kid licking a circle around an ice cream cone.

Next to the ostrich-kangaroo park there would need to be a paintball course set up Halo style, with objectives and sniper towers and stuff.

When I was little in the UP, I had a ball with suction cups covering the surface, so if you throw it at a window it always sticks. I tied it to a string and would throw it at turtles in hopes that it would stick to their shell and I could reel them in. It never worked though. The best technique is to stay far away and try to swim to them underwater while they're sunbathing on a log. Then before you break the surface, reach up with one hand and quickly pin them to the log so they can't flee. We'd catch a half dozen or so and release them on my Grandpa's beach while the ducks were there eating. Sometimes it would cause a hilarious ruckus and the ducks would quack and flap. Are there any lakes around Lompoc?

Kangaroos...right!? right?! I could work with paintball! Only done it once or twice in my life. We would have to get those full black suits with the cargo pockets for our extra hoppers and what not and those amo belts.

Lakes near Lompoc...hmmmm. Lopez is close but the water's too choppy to get alot of good action. Its good for tube wars though! I dominate, I won't lie, it gets intense. San Antonio is the Paso area, its my favorite though. The personal lake though should be fully equipped with a course that we could learn tricks and jumps and hold competitions.

A ZIP LINE! HELLY YEAH!

As far as the turtle thing goes; sounds like awesome times with papa! I'm going to seriously look into turtle hunting. Right before my big spelunking expodition and curling try-outs.

Well get a UFC/MMA/FCF/whateverotherkind there is arena connected to the back part of the house. We'll get Mr. Miagi to help out to.

What? Not of fan or Mr. Miagi?

Mr. Miagi is a crippled old idiot. Definitely a venue of MMA and bikini mud wrestling.

The lake would need a massive airbag that launches little kids into the air when a fat man jumps on the other end from a platform. Then we could mail order a sumo wrestler to launch a midget for shits and giggles.

Did you not comprehend said BLOB!

Sumo wrestler and a midget; awesome idea. You'd probably have them in banana hammocks.

Bikini mud wrestling? I didn't know you were into that...but I guess I could see you in one. Or it could be KY wrestling like in OLD SCHOOL.

We'll get one of those redneck carnival rides for the kids.

I feel like were missing something crucial though...

We should definately look into one of two things; either a room with those huge fans that push you upward so you feel like your sky diving OR one of those zero gravity simulators so we can pretend were floating around in space!!

Zero G simulators? There's no such thing but out in space, or flying in a plane if it nosedives. It would be better to just have a plane, that way you could simulate zero g, and skydive from it whenever you want.

Well who fly's it if im jumping out of it?

I'll throw you out of it!

I'll take you with me. Now we're down a plane...