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Elayna Davis is a young girl with strong convictions. She is inadvertently chosen to be the victim of a handsome and mesmerizing stranger named Michael as he reluctantly embraces his killer instincts. When he pays Elayna a late-night visit he finds he is unable to go through with his intentions after she unwittingly convinces him that he can still be good despite his longings. Michael, grateful for the strength of will she has given him, forms an unusual but strangely necessary bond with Elayna. As their relationship evolves a vengeful act forces Michael to put their friendship aside. He provides for her as best he can in order to make up for her loss and steps from her life while Elayna grows to adulthood. Eventually, their tragic past catches up with the pair and Michael must make the choice between sacrifice and sanctity.

I am a first time novelist and just put my book up for sale on Amazon. It is only available in e-book format, but here is a link for anyone interested:

http://amzn.com/B00BTQKD9C

There are a number of sample pages, so even if you do not end up purchasing the book, I would dearly love some feedback.

This e-book will be available for a free download on Monday, March 25th through Amazon. It is a great book for tweens and young adults. There is some violence, some adult situations, but they are only implied and not graphic. Please consider giving it a read or recommend it if you know someone who would appreciate this type of genre.

You can find it at: http://www.amazon.com/Sanctity-ebook/dp/B00BTQKD9C

I just read the first couple of pages and it's already caught my attention. When I finish it I will go back and review it for you. I too am a new author and just published my first book through Amazon. I am also looking for some honest feedback. If you could go check out my book and read the sample pages I'd greatly appreciate it.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/b00bq3uwte

Mary:

It is not easy to be the judge of your own work, and even harder to find someone else to do it, especially if you are looking for an objective opinion and not just a pat on the back to say "Wow, I can't believe your wrote a book."

I did read your sample pages, and I am by no means a professional author, so my opinions are just that, opinions.

So, I thought the concept was interesting. I do think that you need to stretch out your story out some more and that you gave away too much in the first few pages though. So far it doesn't seem like there is any mystery - if there's no mystery, there's no "need to read" if you will. The first paragraph with the description of Anna seemed a little cliche and I felt that if how she looks and what the townspeople thought of her could have been presented just a little differently, a little more subtly and drawn out you could avoid that impression.

I like the "take me there" approach to writing and I am sure this is true for most readers. I think you may need to describe the town, the time the events are taking place in and to add some color to the characters (via clothing, mannerisms, appearance, etc). The story needs a little more depth, I guess I would say.

I got some pretty good advice from other forums while I was writing, and ended up pretty much rewriting the first 3 chapters of my books a number of times, and actually regret publishing it so soon. If I ever write another, I will definitely take my time and check my patience and try to get more outside input before I throw it out there. There is so much that I would like to touch up now that I've gotten some feedback and been confronted with some honest opinions. Take your time, find some people you trust, and listen your audience.

Good luck with your book!!

Thank you. I totally agree with everything you said. I am working on those things now in my other books I've written. I'm going back through them and changing a lot. I will eventually go back through my first one and do the same. I know I need to expand and explain more details. That is the very first book I've ever written. The first one I've ever tried writing. That's why I'm trying to get as much honest opinion about it as possible so I can improve not only it but my future works as well. Thank you again for your honest opinion. It's great when friends read your work but I've found that they are too nice to roughly critique.

I just finished reading your book. The only things that I saw in it that need some work is there are a few typos but it is a great story. I will be recommending it to my friends and I will post a for it on my website as well as Facebook, Twitter, other forums I am a member of. I hope that helps you out.